Saturday, August 5, 2006

reflecting.....

I am still sick but cannot sleep. I was sitting here listening to music and started thinking about my son Anthony. I think I did a entry about him awhile back. He would have been 13 this year and you know that even if you move on from a loss of a child you never ever forget!!

I picture what he would look like if he were here today with me and I imagine all the fun things him and I would do together! The song "One Sweet Day" by Mariah Carey makes me think of him and it was just on my XM channel I listen to all the time!

I made an entry about making him his flowers that I put at his grave this spring but never put a picture when I got home from visiting him so I figured there was no better time then now!

The headstone behind his is my grandpa's. I am going to end this entry for now by just simply saying to my son........

I love you baby boy!! And you are always in my heart!!

I scanned a pic of me and my son. DO NOT mind the jeans lol. I was 18 years old and went into premature labor 4 months early so I wasn't dressed to have a baby! I spent 30+ hours in labor and he was transferred immediately to Childrens Hospital and I of course went with him. I was awake for about 75 hours with NO sleep and delivering him for 36 hours!! Man was I numb and wiped out when I left the hospital without him!

And I was so pale! My body was so tired! My heart hurt so bad!!!

2 comments:

queeniemart said...

i CAN NOT imagine what it took to scan these pics and talk about sweet Anthony. My best friends sons name is Anthony also. Such a tiny little angel he was....and you were beautiful, even with those ripped pants. Thank you for this entry.
HUGS,lisa jo

carolsixpac said...

aww thats a beautiful picture of you and ur such a wonderful mom. It is so hard loosing a child, my heart goes out to you. Much love and hugs.

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