Thursday, July 27, 2006

Hi guys been awhile again. I just never seem to catch up ever and my journal is always a week behind too lol. I always have so much stuff I would love to write about, but then when it comes down to it I just don't seem to get it done.

I cleaned my Office yesterday and was sitting down taking a break and was looking in my closet and realized something. You buy computers, monitors, keyboards, printers, scanners, ect. When outdated you replace it or at least I do. So my question is how long do you keep the stuff for that you replace? When is enough enough? I took some pictures to show you what I am talking about ;)

OK do you see that? FIVE old keyboards, why the hell do we need them still? I seem to remember replacing each one for some purpose lol. Hubby is a packrat and wants to keep everything. Guess what I am getting rid of them!! K next.....

Ok now here I TWO of the same scanner! WHY? lol and a old printer. I actually have another printer too but it is in my basement. I went out awhile back and got a really nice all in one printer/scanner/copier/faxer. So really we do not need to let these take up space in the closet either right? Wrong says hubby. They are going too! lol.......

I also have two monitors which I forgot to take pics of sitting in there, and they are both the bigger older ones. So why can I not get rid of them too?  Well end result was worth it puter room is all clean lol (except my start of a great collection of old computer shit).

These boxes are so nice I bought them at Michaels and labeled em. They work great for little things you need stored. I got them quite awhile back and so far my kids have not destroyed them lol

Ok, one more. I hate keeping clutter like old papers, ect so I have always only had this one file cabinet. Well yesterday when cleaning in there I had to put some manuals away and a few other things and it would not fit in there no matter how hardI tried. So I guess it is time to go get a new file cabinet!

We have been melting in MN!  So hot, so humid! A friend of mine suggested using chemicals in my pool on my deck. Well I tried it and it worked great for a week. I was gone overnight two nights ago and asked hubby to add chlorine to it that evening I was gone. Came home the next day and looked in it and the pool was nasty green again. "Hun, did you add the chloring to the pool last night?"......"Aw, shit no I forgot."....... Needless to say the pool is draining AGAIN and I have to go out and clean it and refill it! I am not sure if not adding the chlorine really did it, because it was a little cloudy to start with but not like it was after not adding the right stuff like it was supposed to be!

 Well I am off to have some lunch. Hope everyone is doing well!



Thursday, July 20, 2006

Sigh, Grrrrrr, I need a getaway!!

It must just be one of those days today! I am so fu**ing irratated! Hmmm,  is it one of those days or maybe my life really is like this everyday and today it is just bothering me more than normal?


I am tired emotionally, I am so tired! In a family unit you would think that it would be a group effort to get things done. But unless I remember and remind and nag it dosn't! Why is that? Who ever made the rule that the mother in the house was supposed to run the show and keep it all running? Of course I do it and I will do it tomorrow and the next day. But I get really pissed and usually I just let it roll off my back. But today the shit is just not rolling lol.



I have learned a very valuable lesson in life which is pick your battles when it comes to spouses and kids. Because I think I can honestly say that I would be fighting 24/7 with someone in my house if I didn't pick em.



Hubby was going to take my son Joshua up north with him this weekend because I told him I really needed a break, but plans fell thru and they are not leaving tomorrow. I love my son to death and cannot imagine not being with him everyday but in almost 8 years of his life I have not ONCE not had him here at home with me, and because of his disabilities I live a very repetative (sp?) life everyday. Changing him, trying to get him to potty, feeding him and if he is feeding himself having to tell him every bite to take a bite, him getting frustrated because he does not speak and because I am mom I get the worst of it! Him hitting, kicking, pinching, head butting me, ect ect.



So bottom line is I just flat out need a break in the same ole same ole just for a couple days! So then after hubby tells me they are not going my exact words to him were "That sucks" I didn't meen to offend him or say for him to take it personal and analyze it but of course he did! And ends up saying well I will just take him to my moms tonight. The point he didnt get was I am not asking him to leave here with my son or make him feel he needs to leave our house. I just was a little bummed because I was looking more forward then anyone can imagine to have a day or two here at home with out the same daily routine I have done for almost 8 years. And hubby had to pick at my words, tell me I didn't mean this and I said that, blah blah blah. I just looked at him and said "are you kidding me? your gonna start a argument with me over this?" "Do you not already see I am having a really shitty day and I DID NOT MEEN TO OFFEND YOU!!" I simply said that sucks meening bummer" So now hours later he is still being pissy and shitty with me.


I cannot figure out why when he wanted to know what was wrong with me and I told him after him bugging me to tell him he then turns it onto me and gets pissy? Talk about support! lol This may not even make sense because I am not fully explaining all the events that led up to the end of my I can't take it anymore today attitude but at least I feel a little better getting some of it out!



I am NOT a demanding woman, I am not a nagger, I do not have overly high expections as a mother, I do ask hardly ANYTHING of anyone in my household and apparently GOD forbid me from having a bad day. Because I am superwoman! Living with 2 Bi-Polar people one adult and one child they have bad days consistently and I honestly feel I am not entitles to one in there eyes because I am the rock that holds it all together.


OK I am done venting I am going to lay down and pray noone comes into my room to bother me for at least an hour or two! HAHA yeah right! Sorry this was such a downer entry I will write a happier one when I happier! lol


Thursday, July 13, 2006

 Hi just another rambling entry about nothing specific.  It is SO hot here and so dry! The best place to be is in the water or in the house lol. Today I have opted for the house. My 17 yr old took my 9 yr old to a cool water park called Cascade Bay so they have been out of my hair this afternoon! Ahhhhhh the silence ;)

I have got up off and on all day today and did something that needs to be done but I am seriously lacking motivation today! I would be perfectly content sitting on my chaise and catching up on TIVO.

I have quite a few shows that I Tivo and they pile up and pile up and it seems I can never catch up watching them all. But all my favorite shows are done for the season. Soprano's, American Idol, Las Vegas. Those are my top 3.

I really want to go fishing, I am thinking I may try to plan to head up North this weekend to my cousins and use his boat. I love fried fish!! Sunfish! Last summer I caught the biggest damn turtle I have ever seen, and actually got him reeled in. My cousin made turtle soup (which I did not have the stomache to try!). But heard it was very very good. I don't know about that! Lol

Up at my reservation I can get free buffalo meat different cuts, and that is yummy! Burgers, steaks, roasts, all of it!  We even use it in spaghetti sometimes. My kids love it too.

I think I said awhile back that I started playing City Of Villains with my hubby, and the game is pure enjoyment and relaxation to me. I plan to keep playing it but honestly it is almost more reality than fantasy to my hubby. I do not like to harp on him or nag him because I enjoy playing too, but it encaptures his real life and real life seems to not matter as much when he is playing that game! It is hard because I trully love to play, and I trully enjoy some of the friends I have made playing. But I resent it also because myself and my kids seem to have to be put on hold whenever he is playing the damn game!!! Without going to much into detail I will just say that if he has a shitty hour playing COV and dies a bunch, or fails a mission then my kids and I get his attitude as a result. If I am taking my kids swimming and he has just died on the game he will not want to go with, and those are just a couple examples it happens in almost all aspects of life. So what do I do? Why should I have to quitsomething that does not take presidence over my real life? Yet if I keep playing and my kids or myself get pissed at him for playing does that not make my hypocritical?(SP?)

Well enough of that just needed to vent a bit. I am off to make pork chops for dinner ;)

Have a great weekend!

Monday, July 10, 2006


It has been a very busy week! Yesterday we went to my Pow Wow and man was it hot! I did get to eat some yummy indian tacos tho. We ended up only staying for a couple hours because Josh really does not do well in large groups of people. He gets overly stimulated and flips out. So needless to say he was flipping out! Once we got back into our truck tho of course he was all smiles and laugh! ;)

When we left the Pow Wow we went to a town close by and went to the American Legion on the river let the kids run around and we sat on the deck and had a beer. For some reason on really hot day a ice cold beer tastes so good to me.

Right around the time it was getting dark we went to the Drive In and watched Pirates of the Carribean, and Cars. They were both good movies. When we were getting ready to leave our truck started smelling like a skunk. The kids came running in the back of the truck we quickly packed up and left lol

My dog got sprayed by one last summer up north and he had to sleep in the work garage up there for 3 days because he stunk so bad!! Oh and then can't  forget the time that I was out on my deck last summer also. I was sitting at the table and playing on my laptop and looked over and said to hubby "hunny look at that cat standing on our deck" to which he replied " That ain't no cat! It's a skunk!". Oh and can't forget the time last fall that one sprayed in my garage and it stunk SO bad for days. Needless to say I really do not like skunks one bit!

You know what else I really do not understand is those blue pools you buy all over the place now with the riseable walls as the pool fills. I bought my 3rd one about a month ago, it is the 10 ft one. I always put it on my back deck which is level and clear. There are trees surrounding my deck. I always put the cover on it when it is not being used, and we also always run the filter system when told to. BUT for some reason every couple weeks the bottom turns green and I cannot figure out why. It is not a huge pool but it is big enough to be really time consuming to have to empty and clean and refill. I wish I knew why the hell it always turned green like that?? Or if there is anything else I can do to help prevent it from happening.

I am in the process of setting the last dates for taking my son again out to Washington DC for LOTS of appointments and to schedule his 4th Cranial Vault. I will be heading there the first week of Sept.

My house has been a revolving door since school got out. Seems we have at least 2 extra kids here everyday! For example my niece has been here for about a week and a half, and she is leaving today but my daughter has another friend coming over an hour after she leaves. I get tired and I get tired of cleaning ALL the time so my house can look the way I want and need it to look, because I trully cannot stand it when my house is a mess and dosnt smell clean! But it's all good they are having fun ;)

Well I need to run and meet my sister in law. Take care and I will add another entry sooner than later!