Sunday, April 24, 2005

My story

This is my tag I use where I host tournies ;)




I started just recently reading other peoples journals, and man they can suck ya in! So I started thinking with my life and all things I feel and go thru on a daily basis this is a great way to let some of it out! This is going to be a long entry that will have to be continued at another time I am sure because I am going to start from the beginning of pregnancy with my son. For starters I have a daughter Rayanna who is 8 years old also, and I am raising my 15 year old sister also. I live with my soulmate we have been together 8 years and I do not know what I would do without him. I have a dog named Romeo, a lizard named Dracko, and a fish named Red lol. I am an old fashioned romantic type who loves to hang out at home with my family and enjoy the simple things in life. But the catcher is that since the day I found out about being pregnant with my son my life has been anything short of simple and relaxing. Its strange the way the world works, how one thing in this huge world can change someones life so drastically overnight! In the blink of eye! Lets start at the beginning now that I got the introduction out of the way lol..........

Joshua's Story....

I missed my cycle and had a feeling I was pregnant(but my cycles have not been regular for a long time!), but 5 home pregnancy tests begged to differ. One night Bill and I were laying in our living room watching TV and he got kicked in the head! lol. He said "I do not care what those tests say we are going to the doctor because you are most definately pregnant" So I made an appointment and within the week we were there.

 Well obviously I was pregnant, and we had no idea how far along I was since I was so irregular, so I was told that they were sending me to Fairview Riverside for a level 2 ultrasound so we could get a estimated due date. A few days later we went to that appointment and after doing the ultrasound a doctor walks into our room and asks me " So do you know what is wrong with your baby?" We looked at her and said "No, we were not aware we were sent here because something is wrong" I do not think she knew that my ObGyn had not forwarned us.

So we were in shock, scared, sad, confused, and really angry for not being forwarned of what we were being told there. Well we then found out I was very close togoing into my 3rd trimester already. Talk about not much time to prepare ;) The doctor told us she would bring us into a meeting room and give us the list of things that may be wrong with our son. We went into the room and sat down and listened as she named 3 things that it could be.

1. Acrodysplasia

2. Something Chromosome related, like downs syndrome and

3. Craniosynostosis.

His limbs were shorter then normal in the ultrasound. She asked if I wanted to do an Amniocentesis that they could then tell me if it were genetic or chromosomal abnormalities. But I am a very high risk pregnancy, I have never carried full term. And doing the Amnio could have sent me into early labor, so we told her " Its not going to change anything, nor help us to know right now, so no I am absolutely not going to take the risk of bringing him into this world any sooner then he needs to be.

We left the doctors, crying and feeling all the same emotions I wrote a little bit up. We went home and did searches on the internet for all 3 things it could be. No text books, nor internet sites can prepare you for what your life is going to be like when your child is born especially when we were not sure what he really had.

Well 4 weeks (yep thats it from the time of that ultrasound, so 5 weeks total) he decided he was ready to come into this world 2 months early. I delivered him at Abbott Hospital in Minneapolis, Mn because Childrens Hospital is right across the street. I actually went to Methodist Hospital first, where my Obgyn was after my water broke, but he sent me by ambulance downtown because he said they were not equipped to deal with my son.

He was born on October 19th, 1998 and thats the day my whole life changed! The first two years seemed like a whirlwind! When Joshua was delivered they had a team of PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) docs there who wisked him away as fast as I could blink it seemed. We still at this point had absolutely no idea what was wrong with him! What a helpless feeling! I wanted to crawl in his body and take it all away! I am going to end this for awhile, I need to get my kids in the tub and to bed. I will continue later.......